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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26533078">testing</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/comorbidity/pseuds/comorbidity'>comorbidity</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>casual polycule [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alcohol, Kissing, M/M, just that gentle good good, mentions of george/will</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 05:55:50</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,743</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26533078</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/comorbidity/pseuds/comorbidity</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>George didn't intend on having a conversation with Alex so soon - or at all, necessarily. Not that it's a bad thing. sequel to pacing.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>George Andrew/Alex Elmslie</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>casual polycule [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1962247</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>52</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>testing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>George reached for the wine bottle, intending to top up his glass and not expecting it to come up empty. Resisting the temptation to toss the bottle aside in a mock gesture of frustration, George set it back down on the desk and considered his barren glass. He hadn't gone into the evening expecting to drink the whole thing, but it had gone down smoother than he thought it might.</p><p>No wonder. He'd started the night with a lot on his mind, and the wine had done well to distract him... until it was gone, of course. Now he was left alone with his thoughts, magnified in severity about tenfold thanks to his considerable buzz. Actually, "buzzed" was too tame a descriptor - he was properly sloshed, and he knew it.</p><p>The clock on his computer told him it was approaching three am. Not that late, all things considered, though he had managed to accomplish fuck all. Rather than do anything productive - film, edit, plan - he had been browsing Reddit for hours. Call it research, though he knew that was bullshit.</p><p>Truth be told, he hadn't wanted to get any work done - he knew he could afford the time off, and he ought to be taking some before he lost his sanity. But tonight, the idea had been more to keep his mind off of other considerably less professional topics. Namely what Will had mentioned offhand the last time he had been around... because it wouldn't do George any good to be dwelling on that any more than he should.</p><p>So that was precisely where his brain had gone, of course, thoroughly unhindered by the wine (and, perhaps, invigorated to an almost lurid degree, the thoughts rollicking around in exquisite detail).</p><p>Will had certainly given George much to think about, from the suggestion of progressing past the surreptitious wanks (and the occasional head, when Will was feeling notably peckish) to the concept of Alex potentially joining the fray. The former had long ago taken up lodging in his subconscious rent-free and was merely brought to the fore once more; the latter seemed to have infected every waking thought.</p><p>Sure, George was guilty of having entertained the notion of what things might feel like with Alex rather than Will, but though George had been given reason to wonder about Alex and his motives a couple times over, he had never put much real stock into the matter. Friends bantered, bordering on flirtation here and there - there had been no real incentive to believe that Alex felt anything more than friendship for him.</p><p>Of course, he had assumed the same of Will until the day it all began, so that wasn't much of a defense.</p><p>In a sober state, George might have been able to dismiss the idea of Alex being willing to give it a shot. But hammered? The greedy sense of curiosity was almost too much to bear. Perhaps his successful rendezvous with Will had made him cocky, but there was no denying himself in that moment. That Alex might be game was too conceivable in that moment to ignore.</p><p>And the longer he thought about it, the more George was forced to confront the reality that his occasional fantasies about Alex were likely rooted in something more intense than mere curiosity.</p><p>Wishing for a fleeting second that he could have this level of confidence without being half in the bag, George grabbed his glass and stood up from his desk (stumbling only a little as he did so). He doubted he would be falling asleep for another couple of hours, but he figured water might be a good investment for tomorrow. He would need that time to make up for today being a complete write-off.</p><p>The path he wove to the kitchen was slightly winding, and he nearly lost his balance once, but he eventually made it to the fridge in one piece. Not bothering to rinse the wine from the glass, he topped it up with filtered water and took several merciful swigs.</p><p>He very nearly dropped the glass when he heard the low "oi" from the common area behind him. Spinning around on one heel (and slopping water onto his hand), George landed his gaze upon Alex, half-sprawled across the couch.</p><p>"Jesus christ, mate, you nearly gave me a heart attack," George said. His pulse was racing - he could feel his heart leaping in his chest, though that may have partly been from the surge of guilt he felt for his thoughts from mere minutes go. His earlier confidence seemed to have been startled away.</p><p>"Sorry," Alex replied blandly, not sounding sorry at all. He hadn't raised his eyes from his phone. "What are you up to?"</p><p>"I could ask you the same question." Which might have sounded cool if George hadn't stammered his way through it, tongue twisting stupidly upon itself as he tried to speak. His retort wasn't any less valid, though; Alex was rarely the one up and about until the most foolish hours of the morning (and if he was, he typically wasn't likely to be out of his room).</p><p>Alex lifted an eyebrow. "Had a few, have we."</p><p>"Might've," was George's witty reply. He drowned his lack of eloquence in the rest of the water.</p><p>This seemed to satisfy Alex, who returned his attention to the phone. "Couldn't sleep," he said as though there had been no interruption between his answer and George's implied question. "Thought I might throw a movie on or something, but I've been scrolling through my For You page for the last hour." A light smile lifted the corner of his lips. "Go figure."</p><p>"Yeah, I've been about as useful tonight." George refilled the water and went to join Alex, though he took pains to sit on the opposite side of the couch. Already he was fretting that he was doing something suspicious that Alex might pick up on - would sitting on the couch with him be construed as bizarre? - but at least the wine was helping to repress the worst of his anxiety.</p><p>"I can see that," Alex muttered, though not unkindly. There was still the trace of a smile on his face, but the humour had gone from his eyes. "Was Will busy or something?"</p><p>If George's heart had been speeding along before, it had practically stopped dead now. Dimly he realised the question could have come from any number of innocent places, but somehow he knew that he had stumbled headlong into a minefield. Alex knew. Alex knew and George was being baited into confirming what his flatmate had already figured out.</p><p>For all of George's extensive fantasising, he would have never expected to have the rug yanked out from under him by this particular revelation. He wished he could think straight; the wine and the abject panic did nothing to rally his thoughts.</p><p>"What do you mean by that?" he asked, trying and failing for casual, mouth dry as a bone. Sipping at the water did little to help, and he set the glass aside before his shaking hands could drop it.</p><p>Alex's responding glance was all the confirmation George needed to show that he was, indeed, completely fucked.</p><p>"You know what I mean," Alex replied. His expression, while lofty, was also somehow inscrutable. George couldn't make heads or tails of whether he was being accused of wrongdoing or not.</p><p>"I..." George searched for the right response - though what was right in this circumstance? Denial? Admission? A plea for forgiveness... though why would he be apologising? And yet his guilt was overwhelming. "I didn't figure you... knew." His eventual response had come out as lamely as he could have possibly managed, and he gave himself a mental kick.</p><p>"Mate, you're not subtle," was Alex's cryptic reply, leaving George to wonder what he had heard and wither silently at the idea of Alex having to listen to the transgressions occurring behind closed doors.</p><p>"Er." George was still struggling to come up with a sensible reply - or any words at all. "...Sorry?" He still didn't know whether any of this warranted an apology, or if Alex was even upset.</p><p>More importantly, if he <em>was</em>, what did that mean?</p><p>"Why are you apologising?"</p><p>"I don't know," George admitted. His brain felt like the victim of several rounds of mental ricochet, having gone from idle imaginations to foolhardy bravado to completely and utterly disorientation. But in the midst of the confusion, there was another sensation still banging around: hope. Hope in spite of the troubling knowledge that Alex was at least partially privy to his odd arrangement with Will, in spite of the fear of Alex running off in displeasure or, god forbid, disgust. But Alex didn't seem like he was about to run - rather, it looked as though he was struggling with troubled thoughts of his own.</p><p>Alex appraised him for a moment, then his mouth twisted into an almost imperceptible frown. "It's not my business," he said. "Just... might've been nice to know, I guess."</p><p>Before he could stop himself, George was asking the question that wouldn't leave his mind - "Why?"</p><p>"Well -" Alex wrinkled his nose a bit, as if it pained him to keep talking. "I was a bit annoyed, innit."</p><p>"Annoyed," George echoed. It was suddenly a bit difficult to breathe.</p><p>"Well, yeah. Knowing you were running about with Will..." Alex lifted a shoulder and continued to avoid George's bewildered stare. "I mean, if I had known you..." His eyes flicked over once. "You know. If I had known you were into that..."</p><p>"I didn't really think it was important," George replied, though it was a half-truth at best. "Or... maybe I didn't really think about it at all." That was probably more accurate, even though admitting it made him feel even more like an idiot. "Sorry."</p><p>"It's fine." But the faint crease in Alex's brow belied his offhand dismissal. He shuffled a bit on his side of the couch - crossed and uncrossed his legs, then tucked them up beneath him - and cleared his throat. "It's not a big deal."</p><p>It didn't sound like it wasn't a big deal, but George couldn't bring himself to say it aloud. Instead he continued to gaze at Alex with a great deal of confusion, wondering why this was the first time this topic had even come close to being broached. Was it because of the confirmation of his mucking about with Will? Was it jealousy? George's heart gave an unsteady lurch at the thought.</p><p>"Anyway." Alex unfolded his legs once more and placed both hands on his knees as though intending to get up. "That's enough of that, I think, so I'm off."</p><p>"Where you going?" The words sounded stupid the moment they left George's mouth - Alex couldn't be going far in the middle of the night - but he had panicked. This now felt like his only chance, and any misstep could ruin it all.</p><p>"Dunno. Bed." But before Alex could get to his feet, George had half-scooted, half-tumbled over to Alex's side of the couch. George took his flatmate - whose previously hazy eyes had shot open in surprise at the approach - by the shoulders with no further plans than keeping him put.</p><p>"Don't - don't go," George finally managed to stammer, tripping over his tongue in a fumbling rush. "Sorry. I just mean. Stay for a minute." He swallowed hard, acutely aware of the warm blush spreading across his face, and he wished for a moment that he was wearing his mask. Under Alex's wide-eyed stare of shock, George felt more exposed than usual.</p><p>"All right," Alex said cautiously. His gaze travelled over where George's hands were still cinched to his shoulders. "Mind loosening up a bit, though? I bruise easy."</p><p>"Right, sorry." George released his hands as though he had been holding hot coals. He let them drop to his sides, though they itched to grab Alex by the face and pull him in. Closing his eyes, he took a long breath. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you."</p><p>"Wasn't my business, mate," Alex repeated, though George caught the note of bitterness in the words. "You don't have to be sorry."</p><p>"Yeah well, I feel like I do." George rubbed one hand along the back of his neck. "I just... there's never a good time to bring this sort of thing up, y'know? And you don't want to give the wrong idea, or anything like that..." He bit his tongue before he could continue to ramble. The alcohol was making him too candid.</p><p>"The wrong idea," Alex repeated in a flat tone George couldn't decipher in the least. "So what's this, then."</p><p>"What's this..." George stared at nothing in particular as he tried to make sense of how quickly Alex's demeanour had cooled. Then it struck him in a cold wash. "No, I don't mean wrong idea like - I meant - and this is - it's - well, I meant it more like - "</p><p>"George."</p><p>The single syllable was as effective as if Alex had pressed a finger to George's lips. The messy clarification came to a halt as George met Alex's eye with a great deal of hesitation.</p><p>"What do you want?" Alex asked.</p><p>For all they had done together, Will had never explicitly asked what George wanted. Certainly he would ensure that George was on board with whatever was happening, but George had never called the shots. To be put on the spot without warning was not only unprecedented; it had completely thrown him off.</p><p>"I hadn't really gotten that far," was George's honest response. There were distant but familiar urges here and there - the impulse to wrap his arms around Alex, fall upon him, grind their bodies against one another - but more demanding was the unexpected compulsion to crush their lips together with the desperate fervour of two drowning men. He had never kissed Will, because kissing was a line of gentle intimacy that Will had yet to allow himself to experience, and that had been fine with George. Now, though, he wanted little more than to pull Alex into a rough kiss and let things go from there.</p><p>For a moment, George thought Alex was going to roll his eyes - and really, he probably would have deserved it - but then Alex's expression softened fractionally. For a moment, it was almost pitying, and George felt another surge of shame, but it soon returned to a look of quiet curiosity.</p><p>Alex seemed to take a very long time studying George's face, perhaps trying to determine how earnest he was being. Finally, Alex seemed to settle upon a decision. He narrowed his eyes and asked, "Do you mind if I kiss you?"</p><p>"Yeah - I mean, no, I don't," George managed, and this time he was too exhilarated to feel foolish about his unabashed thrill. He let his eyes flutter shut as Alex dipped his head forward and their lips met, Alex kissing him with an almost indescribable softness. It lasted maybe a few seconds, though George couldn't be sure with how dizzily his head was spinning. He felt like a proper moron for reacting so violently to a simple kiss, but there was no denying his erratic heart rate. It felt as though he had been waiting for this for years, even if he had only recently brought those hopes to light.</p><p>Alex backed away by a few inches - far enough to match stares, evaluating the reaction. George could only imagine Alex was seeing stars or some other kind of loony cartoon glimmer in his eyes.</p><p>"You all right?" The question sounded like it came from a place of genuine concern for George's health.</p><p>"Brilliant," George replied, still not caring how idiotic he must sound. "I'm brilliant."</p><p>"You're fucking blotto," Alex said in a reproachful voice, though there was amusement there too.</p><p>"Don't care." George leaned in to close the gap between their faces. "S'long as you don't," he continued, lips nearly brushing against Alex's as he spoke.</p><p>"Nah," was Alex's singular reply, and then they were kissing again. It began as softly as before, a tentative introduction, before Alex brought one hand up to cradle the back of George's head. George responded in kind by taking Alex's cheek in one hand and bracing himself against the couch with the other, leaning his body even further into the kiss.</p><p>When Alex met him with his mouth slightly parted, urging George's mouth to open in return, George made a small, involuntary noise in the back of his throat. The hand that wasn't on Alex's face came up to rake through his hair as Alex pushed his tongue past George's teeth with a deft grace that George couldn't hope to match in his tipsy state. Alex didn't seem to mind manoeuvring the kiss, and George was happy to let him take the reins. That was a trait that wasn't unique to his relationship with Will.</p><p>Alex drew back again, but there was no pause between their mouths coming apart and Alex's lips returning to George's skin, this time tracing kisses along his jawline and neck, travelling downward until he could nuzzle at the crook where the neck turned to shoulder, George's nerves alight and thrumming at every point of contact. He made another unconscious sound, a tiny moan that might have shamed him if he was at all in a place of rational thought.</p><p>"George," Alex said again, the name coming across as a quiet intonation more so than a call to attention, murmured between kisses as he moved back toward George's face. "Still all right?"</p><p>George could only nod in reply, aware enough not to clock his jaw against Alex's face. There were no words to articulate just how he was feeling - how very different this felt from jerking Will off while they outwardly pretended this was entirely not worth discussing - and he hoped that Alex would be able to discern his feelings from the silence.</p><p>When Alex returned to kissing him, George assumed he had gotten his point across. Perhaps when he was sober he would be able to better explain exactly why he hadn't spoken up before, or why this had only come up at this particular moment, or why this meant so much more to him than any amount of fucking around with Will (though maybe that last would be too intense to mention for a while).</p><p>For now, though, he allowed himself to ignore all of those concerns in favour of finally making out with Alex in the most eager and unrestrained manner possible.</p><p>Their hands never travelled anywhere south of the torso, and George was actually fine with that. He had waited long enough to experience something like this with Alex, and he was more than happy to take his time with everything else. Pacing had never been a concern with Will - apart from that which was governed by his own self-acceptance - but George sensed that Alex would also like to move forward with thoughtful deliberation. It felt as though this moment had been long coming; it was only right to give this the consideration it deserved. And while kissing drunk was fun, George wanted to be sober for anything more.</p><p>Distantly George recalled the original suggestion that had set him on this path - Will's taunt about inviting Alex into their mess - and he was surprised to find he still wasn't loathe to the idea. While the situation with Alex was operating with a different set of stakes, there was still something darkly alluring about bringing a third into the somewhat more impassive debauchery. He thought of kissing Alex in front of Will, flaunting the easy, tender physicality they shared that Will had never attained. He thought of Will forcing George's mouth onto his cock in semi-retaliation, though Will's erection would reveal the truth of how watching the kiss had affected him. He thought of Alex taunting Will with lingering kisses along his neck as George sucked him off; Will, determinedly turning his face away from Alex even while his breath caught in his throat, one hand on the back of George's head and the other sliding up to grab Alex's hair almost unconsciously.</p><p>The tableau was so intoxicating that George almost didn't realise that the actual kiss had ended, and Alex was now eyeing him with an expression that indicated he might now be worried for George's sanity.</p><p>"You should go to bed," Alex said.</p><p>"You're right," George replied, unsure if he slurring was due to the wine, the exhaustion, or his whirring thoughts - perhaps a mix of the three. "Talk tomorrow?"</p><p>"Probably should." Alex disentangled himself from George and finally stood. "And drink some more water. I'm not calling the ambulance if you get alcohol poisoning."</p><p>"After all that?" George griped, though he obediently grabbed his half-full water glass and downed the lot despite it being room temperature by now.</p><p>"Yes." But Alex was smiling, albeit tightly, as he said it. "Get some sleep, you idiot."</p><p>"Fine, fine." George entertained a brief but maddening idea of hugging Alex goodnight, and he was mercifully able to overcome the temptation. "Nighty night."</p><p>He thought he might have seen Alex shaking his head, but George was already bent on getting more water from the fridge. Alex was right; sleep was important, and then they would be able to unpack everything tomorrow.</p><p>Maybe they could even try it again, if Alex deemed it apropos.</p><p>George's mind was too addled by alcohol and tiredness to dwell for too long on the logistics of what had happened that evening. He could worry about what this would actually mean for the two of them the next day. As he gulped back another glass of water and made his way to the bath in order to wash up for bed, he could only continue to imagine how a scenario with both Will and Alex might progress beyond what he had already begun to visualise. The worst part was how plausible it all still seemed.</p><p>Yet again, George found his confidence bolstered unexpectedly. There were so many more chances than he ever could have anticipated, and it was overwhelming to try to consider them all. He settled into bed with every intention of mentally exploring the possibilities, driven by the euphoria of his good fortune from the previous several days,</p><p>He was asleep within minutes. His dreams, however, were no less colourful than his thoughts while awake.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>more gerund titles? why not?</p><p>i have yet again set myself up for more, possibly. we shall see how it goes. thank you and i'm sorry.</p><p>9/19 edit: i don't have an encyclopedic knowledge of video backlogs since i'm new here but i just watched the vid in which george admits to his neck being an erogenous zone. i've never felt so validated in my life.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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